The Mess of Who You Are, Dare To Go There
This is the post where I dip my toes back in and tell you life is all sorts of beautifully messy.
This is the note where I remind you (me) that you're doing better than fine, more than enough, and everything is going to be OK. That nothing is missing and you're not broken and even the stuff that you run from isn't nearly as scary as your mind wants you to think.
This is the whisper that says you're safe, even if you can't exactly feel the ground beneath your feet right now.
That you are a beautiful mess, too - wild and unexpected and right on track in your organic becoming - without ever having to know a damn answer to anything.
And you can change your mind about it all, too.
This is the post where I ask you to take a few deep breaths and ask yourself this:
When you close your computer, turn off your cell phone and TV, push away the vision boards, goals and dreaming pages, the self-help courses and calendars and books, taking a moment away from the chatter of your people and the accomplishments of those you admire...
when you do this and take a quiet look around, what do you see? Where in your real-time, tangible, close-to-home (maybe in your home) life and creative-heart are you being called to show up with more presence?
What gives you space and breath and a sense of purpose that no one else has a measuring stick for? What brings you relief?
You might have several answers. It might not be what you first think, or what you've been striving for in the moments of your day-to-day. In fact, it might just throw all of that off for awhile as you move closer to whatever it is, but I invite you to dare to go there.
Don't be surprised if it's uncomfortable to slow down and be in it. Or if it hurts a little at first. That's OK, too. Take it from the nurse in me - sometimes that's exactly the way healing goes. And presence. The kind that has lasting impression anyway; the kind that expands our hearts for a greater truth.
If you listen close, showing up to what your life and relationships ask of you - whether the mess of it needs embellishing or tidying or just to be witnessed - you just might find yourself remembering exactly who you are in the process - who you have always been at your essence.
I'm betting it's beautiful. I'm betting it's gotten a bit messy at times along the way.
And I'm certain it is rich with color and love.