Honest truth? This page irritated me when I made it. More truth... I was really just irritated before I made it. The irritation after wasn't quite so strong, but it was there. What is this weird chakra warrior lady in her strange standing-meditation pose? With wings? oy. I could pinpoint the influence - (I have a thing for old anatomy drawings and they are often in forward facing poses like this.)
As I look back at the page, I sense this is how I often feel. Awkward. Naked. Inbetween flight. Misunderstood. Centering in my practices that just... quite frankly, don't always center me. Moving through the ways that work for me most of the time, and coming out still feeling funky and strange in my own skin.... I get hungry for movement, activation, rawness, freshness... freedom. Yes, some of it is a dance with ego, for sure - and sometimes even she knows what my spirit craves most, acting as compass for the deeper life moving through me.
It's like a hunger for the ocean, the sunshine on your face, or a new trail, with no mind for time - and eyes made for the dance of horizons and sprouting green spirits. That feeling.
Feels about right as the seasons shift into Spring here. A bit of restlessness, a stirring. I see this page today and I am grateful for the moments of contrast and desire in our cycles, and for laying them to page. I am grateful that Mama Earth is there to meet me where I am, unconditionally, no matter how flowing or unkempt my state of being. It is a blessing to feel so deeply.